I focus on what matters to me….

How I Stopped Punishing Myself Even When I Did Not Achieve My Goals – Live A Worthy Life ­. I learned to accept the fact that I have changed. Things that used to matter to me don’t matter anymore. And I need to let them go. 

Do I need to complete that project on my own to prove myself better than everyone else? No. I just need to get the project done.


Do I really want that job promotion? No. I don’t care about it as I plan to start my own business one day.

Do I need to work 16 hours a day to complete all the house chores and my work? No. The house doesn’t need cleaning every day and I can always get some help with the chores. 

I drew a picture of what I really wanted in my life, and I set my attention toward it. Other things that would not be a part of my picture are not worth to worry about.

Rating: 1 out of 5.



now what if you are on tamoxifen?


So I think it is annoying enough that studies have decided women should not have pap smears necessarily on an annual basis – well unless you have had cancer and then I can’t remember exactly but I think I can get one every year and a half versus three years. But now they are changing it up again with Tamoxifen, and I have to be honest, the news is hitting me odd.



Apologizing, of course, isn’t always a bad thing. The problem is with over apologizing, or offering an apology out of habit when one really wasn’t needed.  In fact, all that apologizing may just make you seem weak or timid.

Beyond potentially sending a message of low confidence, over apologizing can lead to a bit of a “boy who cried wolf” situation. If you’re always saying sorry for each small transgression throughout the day, does your apology for a significant event carry the same weight? Times that truly warrant a heartfelt sorry may not feel as authentic when people know you apologize 100 times a day.

All this being said, apologies have their time and place. We just need to be more mindful of knowing when to say sorry or adjusting our approach to accomplish the same goal.

Sitting with my thoughts


Small zen stone towerSitting at the pool remembering my visit to  – Melbourne beach- looking out into the ocean and feeling the sand between my toes and the water lashing at my feet- also collecting shells by the water -I can say it was better than strawberry ice-cream. I felt a inner peace that came over me ..years of medical issues and one time in my life I was at peace. what is it about the ocean that brings me peace?

Get plenty of good quality sleep….

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I think this is one of the most commonly neglected factors when it comes to keeping a positive mindset and not get lost in negative thought habits.

Because when you haven’t slept enough then you become more vulnerable.

Vulnerable to worrying and pessimism. To not thinking as clearly as you usually do. And to getting lost in thoughts going around and around in your mind as you overthink.

So let me share a couple of my favorite tips that help me to sleep better:

Be grateful for what you got……

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When motivation is running low then it’s easy to start seeing your life and the aspects of it through a negative lens.

To put your focus on what you still have and who you are – and to recharge with positivity and motivation ­– ask yourself a question like:

What are 3 things I sometimes take for granted but can be grateful for in my life?

My answers would, for example, be a roof over my head, clean water and not having to go hungry.

Mix things up…..

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A rut will kill motivation. So mix things up. Make a competition out of a task with yourself or with someone else.

When you work out vary what you do instead of going through the motions. Listen to music and podcasts that you usually don’t listen to.

New input and variation tends to be a good way to keep the motivation up (or to recharge it).


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One of the major reasons we don’t follow through with our desires is the fact that we care a lot about what other people think about us. As a result, we get discouraged and don’t pursue things that might fill us with joy. We should focus on finding the courage to do things that make us happy regardless of what others think. We owe it to ourselves to be who we are, not what others want us to be.

Realize that you cannot control everything.

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Trying to think things through 50 times can be a way to try to control everything. To cover every eventuality so you don’t risk making a mistake, fail or looking like a fool.

But those things are a part of living a life where you truly stretch your comfort zone. Everyone who you may admire and have lived a life that inspires you has failed. They have made mistakes.

Reflect on your experiences……

Try this exercise:

∙ Write down all of the experiences in your life that you have overcome (there is nothing too small).

∙ Write down who you have become from them.

∙ Write down what you have learned from them.

∙ Write down who you can help with these experiences.

You see, each of us has had our own experiences and our own trials that we have fought and won with our own talents. There is no other you. Pause for a second. There is no other you.

When we own the strengths, gifts, talents and unique experiences we share, we can truly give it back to the world. We cannot give something to anyone that we do not own.

So the questions become: Why are you here? What are your talents? Gifts? Experiences? What makes you light up with passion and fire inside?

Once we realize our true potential and who we are, and we reframe what failure really means (it is actually a good thing), we can step out and go after what we want without hesitation.

It is time to fully live, to step into our strengths and use our unique gifts that we have to offer this world. Step up and create a life you wake up excited for! No one truly wins when you play small.

The choice is yours. And that is the beauty of it.

Discover your strengths, gifts and talents….

To discover your strengths, gifts and talents, try the following:

 Make three separate columns with the following categories: strengths, gifts and talents.

∙ Write down all of the strengths, gifts and talents you know you have.

∙ Write down all of the strengths, gifts and talents you think you have.

∙ Ask five of your closest friends what they think your strengths, gifts and talents are.

∙ Write down all of the strengths, gifts and talents you see in others that you admire. (Note: If you spot it, you’ve got it. If you see it in someone else, it is that part of you sees itself in the other person.)

∙ Accept all of these as yours. Own them and step into them. Think of ways to incorporate them into your daily life.

Figure out what you want…..

Answer this: If you had a magic wand and could have anything you wanted, what would it be? If there was no chance of failure, what would you choose?

When you answer the questions above, do not think of the answer from a fearful, emotional state.

Some ways to help you answer from an empowered state is to do any or all of the following exercises before answering the question.

Know who you are…….

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The greatest gift we have is the power of choice. We can choose, right now, to start on a path that honors our authenticity, our passion and our purpose.

It comes down to the power of choice. Stepping into your power and making a true decision. A decision to stop playing small, stop settling and to start stepping into your power. To fully live and not just exist. To no longer sleepwalk through life. To no longer just check the boxes off, but wake up excited! This life is yours for the choosing.

It is my belief that we are each born to give something back to this world. One of the major things in life is to tap into who we really are: the free, empowered, non-hesitating, special person gifted with our own strengths, gifts, talents and unique experiences.